Evan Hansen's Clone
by Clonecest42
Summary: Evan Hansen wakes up after a bad day of school to discover a clone! Feeling lonely his entire life, Evan tries to grow close with himself. [Contains romantic acts many people may find weird. Does contain light nudity. No violence or explicit sexual activity, other than light nudity. Part 4 is a bit more risque than the rest, so be cautious]
1. Part 1: Awakening

It was another miserable day for 18-year-old 12th grader Evan Hansen at his High School. Talked to no one, noticed by no one, loved by no one. This was a regular occurrence, so usually Evan would be unalarmed. However, something was different in his psyche today. He was starting to ask a question he never thought of before: Why? Evan thought, "I am kindhearted, musically talented, and, though I hate to be conceited, decently handsome."

Of course, he knew the answer was his crippling social anxiety that caused him to act awkward around literally anyone, preventing him from engaging in any friendly contact. "If only" he continued in his mind "someone was kind enough to give me the attention, so that they can lead, and I can follow." Unfortunately, this was not the way of the average student in the modern school system. You had to be assertive to make friends.

Walking into his room, wearing his usual blue-striped polo, almost high-water khakis, and long, wrinkled white socks, Evan plopped onto his bed, full of melancholy. He wondered "I wish there was someone, ANYONE, who was easy to approach, gentle with conversation, and able to free me from this cocoon known as 'anxiety'. Full of teary-eyed despair, Evan rested his head on his pillow and began to doze off, fully dressed.

Two and a half hours later, after a seemingly dreamless nap, Evan's eyes began to reopen. He felt something strange, however. The bed felt warmer and tighter, as if his personal space had been infiltrated. Wiping the fuzz out of his eyes, Evan tried focusing on the strange distorter of his bed. When his vision was fully clear, Evan squeaked. Right in front of him, on the other side of his not-so-large bed, was an exact duplicate of him, staring right back at him with the same exasperation. It was like looking in a mirror: same clothes, same blue eyes, same light brown hair.

Neither Evan could talk. Both were full of so much shock that words were stuck in their mouths like rats in a cage. "Wh...wh...who are you" both Evans said at the exact same time. They quickly moved away from each other, then moved closer in order place their palms on their counterparts palm. A series of gestures followed, including pointing, gasping, and other strange hand motions. With the initial astonishment wearing off, the Evans finally managed to let one of them speak alone.

"Y... you're me!" The other responded with a faint yet impactful "y... yeah!" The silence broke into hesitant giggling.

"So.. heh... it looks like our wish came true." Both Evans thought back to before their nap, when they wished for someone to talk to. "Yeah... who would've thought that the person I could most easily talk to was myself...!" The giggling evolved into nervous laughter. Even with it being himself, Evan still retained his conversational anxiety.

"So..." one Evan started "What should we do then?" Both Evans began to think, but realized they never had real friends before, so cooperative planning was not their strong suit. "We could play a video game... but I... we... only have one controller." The other Evan nodded and replied "Well, we could do what other people do and hang out somewhere, maybe play some sports?" A momentary pause caused Evan to resume "sorry... yeah terrible idea I know... I just have no idea what people do together for fun..." This depressing statement caused both Evans to sigh in unison. "I guess we could just watch a movie on our laptop." "Sounds good I guess."

One Evan went in the kitchen to get snacks, while the other picked out a movie on Amazon. "Haha nice one" the snack-grabbing Evan said as he reentered his room. " _The 6th Day_ , what a perfect movie." As he went to join the other Evan on the bed, Evan tripped on a toy truck, spilling his snack hoard of popcorn and cookies. "Sorry... sorry... sorry... uhhh..." He began tearing up, realizing that he could not even act normal around himself. "Hey... uhh... its ok dude" the bed Evan said. He hopped to the floor and began aiding in the cleaning of the spilled snacks. There was no talking while this was happening, but at one point the Evans accidentally touched hands, leading both to blush and to quickly whisper "sorry."

After that incident, the doppelgangers climbed onto opposite sides of the bed and turned on the movie, one half of the laptop on each Evan's leg. During the movie, one Evan pondered and spoke "How do you think there are two of us now? Was it magic that caused our wish to come true?" While these words came out of his mouth, he still was mentally embarrassed, as was his double. This whole time, its been nothing but awkwardness between the two shy boys. And it was just himself! His realization came to be that it was truly his fault he could make no friends.

Instead of answering, the other Evan began to sniffle. The other Evan joined in. The sniffling turned into tears, and the tears into ugly crying. Two of the same cries in unison echoed through Evan's tiny room. Needing to relieve the stressful pain caused by their breakdown, the Evans looked for something to squeeze: and each other happened to be the closest object. With the movie still playing, the Evans began to hold each other tightly, which eventually transformed into light hugging and rocking back and forth.

"Why can't we do it?" one Evan spoke, pausing the movie. "It makes me so frustrated... it's not fair...!" Agreeing, the other Evan, whose head currently rest on the other's shoulder, responded "I have no idea... all my life I've seen people talk... form meaningful relationships... do anything that means something to another. I... I just can't seem to do that... and nobody else understands... so nobody else can help..."

"I understand." The other Evan pulled his head back and stared at his reflection with damp, red-ringed eyes. A moment of peace and connection calmed the Evans down, at least for now. "Y... you're right. I think I understand our fulfilled wish now... it gave us a shoulder to cry on... a shoulder that gets why its being cried on." Still looking deeply into each other, their frowns turned into slight grins. After one last embrace, one Evan spoke "I don't care how it happened. I'm just glad it did." The Evans chuckled and in unison said "Thanks."

After learning that their mom was going out of town for a few days, the Evans began to ready for bed. Though they did not have school the next day, nor any plans, they still wanted to experience life with someone they can call "friend." Being the anxious boys they are, the Evans took turns taking showers and used different toothbrushes. They still, however, stripped to their matching underwear: light blue boxer briefs, in order to sleep, as they found pajamas too uncomfortable.

"I like to keep my socks on when I sleep..." one started. "...because your feet get cold? Same." the other ended. "Yeah... sorry... I keep forgetting we are the same person." Awkwardly sitting beside each other on the bed, an Evan asked "So... who gets the bed?" After a tense moment of silence, both Evans spoke "You can have it..." "No you!" "He he... stop..." "I guess..." one interjected "We could share the bed? W... we are the same person... and I... I" He froze. "If you are thinking what I am thinking, t... then I agree." What were they thinking? "I enjoyed our cuddle" were the unspeakable words. Because they both knew what they were thinking, they both got under the covers, and one Evan wrapped his arms around the other. As one Evan's hands touched the other's belly, the uncomfortable face each was making reformed into a half smile.

For the first time in what feels like forever, Evan was eager to wake up the next day. Before cruising to the land of dreams, one Evan relayed something that was on both minds. "I'm glad there is finally somebody who likes me..." A short delay was followed by "I wonder if I'll ever find somebody who loves me." This single thought haunted the slumber of the Evans that night.


	2. Part 2: Flow

The next morning, both Evan Hansens woke up at the exact same time: 9:24 AM, with one Evan's arms still comfortably wrapped around the other's. Both minds were racing with various concerns about how they should act today. The racing was tempered when one spoke. "So...sh... should we get up now?" he asked. "I guess so..." After a short pause, both Evans rose to the opposite sides of the bed, and headed for the bathroom. An awkward squabble commenced over who got to use the toilet first. Afterwards, both Evans, still undressed, headed to the kitchen.

There were no words spoken during the preparing of the cereal. Neither Evan knew what to say. Once they finally had their bowl halfway full with milk and Special K, one Evan hesitantly started the conversation.

"So... what should we do today." "Well we can't go out into public like this, it would freak people out." "You're right... and there's nothing to do in here but sulk and watch movies..." This last statement was said half-sarcastically, but there was no giggling afterwards. "How about we just hang out in the woods in the backyard... it's quiet and peaceful back there..." "S... sure. Sounds fun." This conversation was less than pleasant for either Evan. They thought that after their connection last night their anxiety around each other would fade. Unfortunately, it only made things more tense today.

To prepare for their trek, the Evans brushed, washed up, and put on their clothes. The simple, shy boy Evan was, he had at least two of each of his articles of clothing. Both Evans, unknowing to each other, but on the same clothes: a green and white striped shirt, blue jeans, and a purplish-gray hoodie.

"Great minds think alike.. ha ha" one Evan whispered, which made the other snicker. The Evans exited their back door and stealthily entered the wood. Following a flowing creek, the Evans jumped from rock to coast to rock like young boys, experiencing something they used to do alone, together for the first time. One Evan pointed "Look! It's a _betula populifolia_...!" "A grey oak" the other responded "you can tell because of the chalky bark and black triangular patches, and its unwillingness to exfoliate..." "Oh yeah... sorry... I forgot we know all the same things... kinda makes conversation hard ha ha..." Birds chirping filled the air while neither boy spoke, continuing down the stream.

As the ventured farther, the Evans called out to the other whenever they something that interested them, usually a tree. "I love trees" one Evan randomly spoke "they're beautiful, sturdy, reliable, and life grows all around them in perfect harmony." "Yeah..." the other responded in awe, taking in the presence of nature "trees are the one thing in my life that remain stable..." Looking down at their reflections in the water, the Evans silently continued on.

There was very little conversation until the Evans stopped at a small field with a singular, ginormous tree in the center. "My favorite spot" both Evans exclaimed in unison. They quickly looked at each other with unsurprising surprise, but also with a little annoyance. Both Evans thought simultaneously "but this is my spot... I get that its me but... I never had to share this before... hmmmm... maybe this will be good for me though... getting me out of my comfort zone..."

After their mental dilemma, the two Evans walked up to the tree and put their respective backs to it. Shoulder to shoulder, the Evans rested. All they could hear was the wild. This cleared their mind of all mumbles, but unintentionally allowed something else to enter.

"Hey... so... do you enjoy being around me... uh you... me" one Evan said, flustered. "I... I mean I guess... sorry... its hard... and I know you think the same way as me... so anything I say you probably think too... so whatever your opinion is is probably mine too" He was right. The other Evan was also split on their friendship. Of course, it was finally nice to have somebody to talk to, but nothing they said seemed to mattered.

"The way we sleep, the way we dress, our interests and knowledge... it's all the same... so what's the point..." Both Evans put their heads down so they couldn't see each other. They slammed their hands down at the same time as well, which caused their fingers to overlap. Both pulling away at the same time, one Evan nervously began to speak. "That also means we know each others secrets..." Both Evans went red. "M... maybe we could talk about them... clear our minds..."

The other Evan's head shot up, full of shock but also agreement. "S...sorry! F...forget i aske..." "N... no I think it's a good idea..." The Evans looked into their double's eyes. "You're thinking what I'm thinking... and I know you are." This caused a slight chuckle in both throats.

"Our sexuality."

This ceased the giggling and brought on discomfort in both Evans. "Mhm... we've never shared our bi..." he swallowed "bisexuality with anyone..." "Yeah... I know there's nothing to be ashamed of... but it's so hard... especially when you talk to no one in the first place..." "And then there's Zoe..." Both Evans knew they wanted this sentence to end with that singular name. They pined after Zoe all throughout High School, but it was never meant to be.

"If I... we can't... can't find somebody that lov... uh cares for me... us now... will we ever?" "Of course there's mom... but that doesn't count... it's her duty to love us..." Both Evans started sobbing. "Sorry... I... I can't tell if this was a good or bad idea... to talk..." There was no response, as both Evans knew the answer.

A momentary stillness full of sniffing was ended with an abrupt "I don't even know what a kiss feels like..." The big ears of both boys nervously perked up. Once again, they knew what each other was thinking. But there was no way to say it aloud, as what they were thinking was taboo. Disgusting. Curious. Alluring. The Evans turned their heads slowly towards each other, shaking at the same frequency. "Sh... sh...ould" Words could not exit their mouths. They knew what they wanted, and they knew how to get it. But should they? As the thought plagued their minds, they slowly moved closer to each other, mouths open, eyes closed.

Finally, after seconds of strange bobbing, the two mouths intersected. At first, due to their lack of experience, the kiss was slobbery and uncomfortable, causing a few jerk backs and a few "S... sorrys." However, after a few attempts, they started to get the hang of it. Eventually, the thoughts that invaded their minds once again were exiled, and all they could focus on was each other. Hands grabbing each others heads was just one of the gestures that occurred during this make out session. As they decided to finish... they slowly pulled away from each other, made a nervous noise, and smiled.

They sat their happily tranquil for about 30 seconds until in unison they exclaimed a, for the first time, a happy "Wow." In a cute, boyish voice, one Evan said, still smiling "Ha... I'm a pretty good kisser." "I couldn't agree more. Not we know what we like and don't like ha..." Both boys exclaimed in a voice louder than their normal talking voice, "Less. Tongue." They began to laugh louder than they ever had around each other before. No sorrys this time. Finally calm, the Evans kicked off their shoes and started to warmly cuddle at the base of their favorite tree. "I lov... like this..." both thought to themselves.

With all the confusion and stress for the moment exiled from their heads, the Evans thought back to their query over whether or not this was a good idea. Immediately, both computed the answer:

"Yes."


	3. Part 3: Futureproof

A morning of unforeseen joy was put to a momentary halt as the day reached noon. The halt was caused by the grumbling of two identical teen boys' stomachs. Since their romantic moment, the Evans had spent the rest of the dawn lazying around and playing with each other on their sacred spot.

The way back down the creek caused echoing of overlapping dorky laughter as the two Evans conversed over their newfound happiness. From finally being able to gossip about annoying classmates to obsessing over their favorite hobbies, the boys' connection grew even stronger.

"How about that guy Jared Kleinman? Always pretending to be our friend just so he gets his mom to pay for car insurance!" one Evan exclaimed. "Yeah!" the other continued. "You know... I always thought that we had some sort of secret friendship going on... but now that I have you..." He quieted and moved closer to his counterpart. Softly grabbing his duplicate's hands, he finished "I know what true friendship is like." The two Evans shared a warm kiss before continuing, holding hands as the walked.

Finally arriving home around 12:30, the two Evans entered the kitchen immediately, playfully shoving each other as they entered the house and removed their shoes. Evan unfortunately lived in a low income household, and he himself barely ate due to his depression. Due to this, the kitchen was not fully stocked. However, starving for the first time in ages, the Evans scavenged the refrigerator and cabinets for any semblance of a proper lunch. In addition, wanting to eat the exact same thing so neither Evan felt sorry for the other, they needed to find something they had a lot of, and getting a pizza was definitely out of the question for the two awkward boys.

Eventually, they settled on the only thing they could find: ramen sitting in the back of their cupboards for who knows how long. While the water boiled, the Evans went and put on something more comfortable. They changed out of their partly wet jeans and put on some comfy thigh-length black shorts. Looking at each other, they both had a similar thought. "Woah..." their mind fluttered. "I've... never noticed... or thought to notice... or wanted to notice... hm... how... nice... my legs are." They chuckled this strange thought before heading back to fetch their noodles.

Plopping on the couch with bowls in their hands, the Evans started flipping through television channels. The two boys sat as close to each other as possible, the hairs of their legs rubbing against one another. As they channel surfed, one conversation among the chatter stood out to both of them.

"So... how do we hide... us... to mom? She returns in three days, and once spring break ends at least one of us has to go back to school... as much as we don't want to." "Yeah... and what about after high school? If we go through with our leap year plan it should be easier... but even then... after that how will we deal with college?" So many bridges neither boy wanted to cross. "Are we gonna have to be like a cartoon and have one of us hide at all times? For the rest of our life?"

They started slowly moving farther apart from each other.

One Evan whimpered. "Just when something good finally happens in in my life, another wall is built to block my happiness..." "The world just can't handle two of us I guess... no offense" "Well... the world sucks then." The Evans locked their hands together. "Life just loves taking... doesn't it... right when I find someone who I appreciate... some who appreciates me... someone I lov..." He cut himself off. The Evans, almost on the verge of tears once again, were jolted by this half-spoken word, and quickly looked at each other, full of both surprise and relief.

"I... I... what I meant... was..." "No... no... it's fine... if... if what I think what you were gonna say... which I know it is... then..." A pause. "I love you too" he nervously and quietly concluded. With a quick movement, they began to passionately embrace. Kissing each other on the neck, the Evans finally realized their true feelings. "I... I don't care how hard is in the future... I found love... a warm love like I've never felt before. I love love and I won't give it up no matter the trials we may face." The other smiled and said "I couldn't have said it better myself..." Another pause. "Wait..." This caused both boys to erupt in intense laughter. Another plight attacking their psyche was overcome, building an even stronger connection between them.

"We need to stop questioning the wishmaker haha... Both times we were unsure of these... happenings... something good came close after." With bright grins on both of their faces, the Evans began to cuddle, completely forgetting about their soups now sitting on the coffee table. At the moment, they were romantically oblivious to all their surroundings.

Eventually, the Evans resumed their television watching. A channel they eventually landed on was some party news channel showing footage of a concert of people at a spring break party on some sunny beach. "Man am I glad I'm not there" one Evan commented, still comfortably hugging the other Evan. "Imagining being around all those psychos... drinking... throwing away their life just to party... how embarrassing" he snorted. "Ha yeah."

Both of them were lying to themselves, and both of them knew it. The Evans wanted nothing more than to be able to be like other people. They wanted to have enough willpower to party with strangers and break the rules once in a while. No words were spoken about this torment to each other, as both knew talking about it would only bring out something ugly, and with the way the day was going, they wanted to keep some semblance of beauty.

The boys managed to cuddle for hours. Watching television or using the laptop for hours was not an uncommon thing for a loner like Evan to do. However, doing it with someone else, to them, made the experience twice as enjoyable.

At around 8 pm, the boys decided to give their eyes a rest and take a shower. Like last night, they were planning on taking separate showers. That was until they got another glimpse of their respective's legs. Not wanting to be separated for even ten minutes, one Evan stuttered. "Do you want to... uh... take a shower together?" Of course, being the same person and all, the answer was a definite "sure."

After stripping nude, the two Evans consecutively and awkwardly stepped into the steamy shower. They looked dead ahead towards each other, and cautioned their mind to not look down. Even being the same person, the Evans were nervous about looking at each other's "private area," as they called them in their mind . They have never seen another man's junk before in real life, so this was a fresh experience for both of them.

Post nervously twitching for a few seconds, the Evan closer to the faucet spoke. "Umm... so that we can both be in the water, I'll turn around... and you can... uh... hold on to me..." "OK" the other Evan confirmed, both hesitantly and eagerly. As one Evan spun around, the other one grabbed onto his hips, slowly moving them up his soaked body til he reached his abdomen. Although the hold was a hover at first, he eventually pressed his entire body on his double, head on the shoulder, and private regions comfortably pressed against the buttocks. However, unlike the start of the shower, neither Evan cared. It felt good. They were now fine with their body, and their other's body. Both Evans erased the term "private parts" from their mind and inserted the proper word. No longer were they ashamed of themselves for thinking this way, and this caused them to silently smile.

At this exact moment, the Evans realized that the rest of their night would be even more special than the rest of the day. While their relationship grew fast, their love for each other would grow even faster.


	4. Part 4: Resonance

The Evans' romantic shower set a precedent for the night that follow. As the raining water turned cold, the Evans decided it was finally time to hop out. One step at a time, the Evans followed one another back to their room. Grabbing towels, drying off, and putting on clothes were all performed while awkwardly yet seductively looking at each other. They both slapped on a pair of faded yet elastic blue boxer briefs and, of course, white crew socks. While they did come to terms with each others' bare bodies, they still preferred the softness that came with a little bit of clothing (and neither particular liked the feeling of feet).

Before either clone could start a conversation, the Evans grabbed each other, one by the hips and one by the shoulders, and began making out. It was finally time for a certain bump to arise in each Evans' boxers. This did not phase either Evan, however, and their kissing session continued.

Just like during their first kiss, the minds of the Evans were clear, except for their focus on each other. From fearful child to a romantically-drived adult in one day, the Evans' passion at this point knew no bounds. One Evan pushed the other onto the bed and jumped on to join him, continuing their kissing. At first, they both were on their knees. However, they eventually rolled over onto their hips, and then rolled again so one Evan was on top of the other. One Evan starting rubbing the other all over their body, specifically in places he knew brought himself pleasure, eventually reaching the other's butt. Squeezing the soft fabric of his counterpart's boxers, this caused an eureka in the minds of the Evans. This was the most pleasing feeling they have felt so far. This caused the other Evan to copy the movements. At the moment both Evans were tightly grasping each other's buttocks, there was pure euphoria between the clones. The earlier passion comment, however, was not a lie. Their passion may have went a bit too far, as one Evan was grasping on a bit too hard, pulled back, and spanked his double. 

"Wah! Ow!" one Evan pulled away. "Ohmygoshimsososorry." the slapper Evan screeched. Fear was back into their eyes for the first time in an hours. A new record, however.

"I... I can't believe I just did that..." "Neither can I..." Their hormones were dying down. "I... I just love you so much... I've never gotten carried away in anything like that before..." This was true. Passion was always something lacking in Evan's life, and finally obtaining it in such a rapid fashion was extremely overwhelming and unstable. After a few more seconds of silence, the other Evan replied. "It's... it's OK. Other than... you know... the actual painful part... it felt nice being alive for once." The Evans made a nerdy chuckle at each other, hugged, and reached a fast forgiveness. That was enough provocative activity for one night. This night, however, was still young.

It was about 9:00 pm, and neither Evan wanted to sleep. Even with the long day they had, their adrenaline was racing. Not only that, their bond with each other did not deteriorate after the incident, it only grew stronger. They would not leave each other's side. When the Evans had to use the bathroom, they went together. Whenever they walked around the house, playful shoving and tickling in just the right spot were always mainstays. There was more giggling than talking that night.

Activities for that night were the usual single Evan ones. Watching television and YouTube, taking turns playing video games, etc were all on the menu. During each activity, the Evans were pretty much on top of each other, their skin like two oppositely-charged magnets.

"This is out of nowhere... but I have to say..." one Evan spoke with a high-pitched, laughy voice. "Wait! Let me guess" the other interjected with glee. "You love the warmth of my skin and rigidity of my legs. The softness of my hair and the my soothing voice?" "Gee, how did you know?" he said sarcastically but also happily. "Because that's how I feel about you." They shared an identical giggle and kiss, and then one Evan came up with an idea.

"You know... about our voice..." "I already know where this is going, and I love it" he said, tapping on his duplicate's nose. Evan had always enjoyed singing, but he was too shy to sing in front of other people, and was always self-conscious, no matter how good of a singer he actually was. However, he now had a partner he could duet with. "Should I boot up some karaoke?" "You know it, brotha!" He said while shooting finger guns.

The Evans loved musicals, so for their first song, they decided on one of their favorite musicals: Spring Awakening. They fittingly decided on _World of Your Body (Reprise)_ , and after a somber yet melodic duet, one Evan spoke. "You know? How about something more upbeat?" "I know just the thing!" He put on an even more fitting song, _Love is an Open Door_ , the recently released Broadway soundtrack version. "Who gets to be Hans and who will be Anna?" one Evan proposed. "I'll be Anna!" both Evans shouted at the same time, laughing. "Fine fine, we'll flip a coin." After deciding their parts, the Evans began.

"All my life has been a series of doors in my face, then suddenly I bump into you!" one Evan sang, smiling at his other. "I was thinking the same thing! Cause like, I've been searching my whole life to..." he produly changed the lyric "see my own face! And maybe its the party talking or the chocolate fondue."

They happily continued the song, harmonizing perfect vibratos during the "Love is an open door!" sections. Their favorite part was the line "Our mental synchronization, can have but one explanation" due to the particular circumstance of their singing. They even did the little robotic dance in perfect sync.

Towards the end of the song, the Evans were intensely into each other's voices. The "With you's!" were sung with the loudest voice the Evans ever achieved while singing. Without a care in the world except for each other, they finished with the dialogue.

"Can I just say something crazy!?" Hans-Evan said in a dorky, showtune voice. "I love crazy!" Anna-Evan giggled. "Will you marry me!?" He bent down on one knee, holding out an invisible ring. "Can I say something even crazier? Yes!"

The music stopped, but not in their heads.

Eventually, at around midnight, the Evans got into bed together, snuggled together as if there was glue between them. "You know what?" one Evan said with a never-before-seen vigor. "I want to actually marry you." The other Evan responded without shock, as he knew it was coming. "I want to marry you too!" Their hearts sunk. "But how? We would never ever find anyone willing to do it!" "We could at least pretend we are married..." "Let's throw a pretend wedding!" "With just us two?" "I mean why not?"

Their minds wandered a little. "I hate to admit it... but I wish we were like the people on that Spring Break beach... having tons of friends willing to witness our communion." This was hard for Evan to come to terms with, as he always rejected that behavior out of embarrassment. But being able to say this aloud awoken another latent freedom within Evan's mind.

The Evans stayed awake for a few hours, just laying in bed and discussing what their dream wedding would be. "Honestly I'd prefer for it to just be us. I don't want anyone to share our love. Is that selfish?" "No I don't think so. It's just natural for us to experience what other people get to. Something extraordinary." "Yeah... I guess."

They eventually dozed off at the exact same time, and dreamed about this seemingly unobtainable union. The impossibility, however, only made their passion to wed stronger.


	5. Part 5: Toppings

As the harbinger sun rose, signifying another special day, the Evans, cozy in their bed, began to awake. Only, something felt different this morning. Similar to Evan's previous nap awakening, he felt tight, his personal space feeling even more infiltrated than usual. He fluttered his eyes, trying to focus on what the problem was, and sat up. The bed shifted and creaked. Finally clearing his vision, Evan looked forward.

Four identical, screechy gasps were exhausted.

There were now four Evans, all in their undergarments, sitting criss-cross on the bed. All four, in complete and utter shock, felt each other's bodies to make sure they were not imagining it.

Finally coming to senses, one Evan let out a "Wait!". "Oh yeah!" another Evan responded. "The wish!" a third interrupted. "Our wish for the wedding: an audience!" the fourth finished. All four Evans let out a joyful, dorky laughs that resonated with each other to create a strange echo, which led to more laughter, which thus led to a skin-slapping group hug.

"So" one Evan started as they all collectively traveled to the kitchen "We need a plan." "Right, so we set up a fake marriage, and one of us can pretend to be the preacher." "But which two of us get to get married?" This stumbled their brains of the four boys, until one came up with a solution. "Let's just take turns? A pair of us goes, and then the second pair?" "Nice thinking, me" the other three Evans snorted.

"Wait..." one Evan interjected with a somewhat serious voice. "No offense... to anyone... but I want to marry the me I was with yesterday... so... which one of you is it. Raise your hand if you were Hans yesterday when we were singing." All four Evans half-rose their hand. "What the...? Raise your hand if you were Anna." All four half-rose their hands again, and one replied. "It's weird... I sorta remember... doing both?" Perplexed, one Evan tried to make sense of it. "Maybe when we split... all of our memories are put together and distributed evenly?" "God... this is so weird... lets just not think about this magic mumbo-jumbo and just enjoy this wedding... we'll pick partners randomly."

And so the Evans moved on to the next topic: wedding preparation. They split up their jobs in order to quickly set up for the ceremony. Two Evans decorated using leftovers party decorations found in the basement. Another picked out some special clothing for the night: white boxer briefs for the grooms and black boxer briefs the observers. The fourth Evan was cursed with a job no Evan would even dare want: food duty. They obviously did not have enough food at the house for a real party, and they wanted something special for the big day.

Using their laptop, they ordered four large pizzas and a few liters of soda. As they waited for the pizza to arrive, the chosen Evan, the only one forced to wear clothes at the moment, paced around the house full of sheer nervousness. "Wh.. what if I lose my voice? What if I close the door on him while he's counting change? Wh... what if I don't tip well? Wh... what if I call him "Dad!?" Wh..." One of the other Evans grabbed him by the head. Even though the three other Evans hearts were racing just as fast out of anxiety, they knew they had to help their chosen self out of this dark place they knew all too well. "Sh... sh... it's gonna be OK, we'll be right here for you when you're done. Just don't think hard about it... I know it's hard... but I... we believe in you." The other two Evans came up and grabbed him by the shoulders.

Looking into six shining blue eyes, Evan reached into his spirit and grabbed onto an essence of willpower, as he now knew he had a reason to fight his anxiety. The three Evans each reached in for a kiss, one on the lips, and one on each cheek. Just as they pulled away, the doorbell rang. It was the moment of truth. The destined Evan walked up to the door as the other three hid behind the nearest wall. Opening the door, Evan was as prepared as he would ever be.

"Hey boss I got four large pizzas for ya and four soft drinks?" the pizza man spoke. "Y... yeah" Evan replied. "That will be $48.50." Evan awkwardly handed him a five ten dollar bills and patiently waited for the change. After trading the money for the pizza, the delivery man ended the trial with a "Have a nice day." "You.. too" Evan said as he rapidly closed the door.

Turning around, Evan saw his three lookalikes smiling with extreme pride. Placing the pizza on the table, he grabbed onto one of his doubles and started intensely making out with him. The other two followed his lead and started making out.

Their fervor while making out eventually led all four to the couch in the living room. Two Evans were sitting back to the cushion, legs down, while the other two were on roosted on top of their adjacent's legs. By the time the pizza Evan reached the living room, his entire outfit was stripped off except for his iconic boxer briefs and socks.

This session went on for quite a bit of time. There was a lot of switching back and forth between partners, performed in many different stances. At the climax, all four Evans were laying on the couch, squeezed into one another like a sandwich, still passionately kissing all the way. The Evans particularly liked four-way kissing, where all four set of lips interlocked into a tangle of love. They also brought back their favorite part, butt clenching, even with the trouble it caused last time.

Eventually, the excitement of overcoming hurdles settled down, and all four Evans were calmly and comfortably sitting on the couch.

"Wew, I've never felt so much positive emotion in my life." All four Evans were still gasping for air, so their identical "uh huhs" of agreement came out soft, yet gleeful.

With homemade wedding decorations throughout the house, one Evan, finally with oxygen in his lungs, spoke. "You know... I'm kinda tired to get wed... think we should wait til tomorrow for the big day?" The other Evans, of course, agreed. "Oh my god imagine waking up tomorrow and all of us feeling all four experiences today... including the pizza delivery and the... ahem... love making." This thought got all the Evans giddy.

Postponing the wedding until the next day, the four Evans spent the rest of the day doing things they used to do with two people, with four: singing, watching TV, even playing board games. Now that there were four of them, the Evans could now play some of their favorite board games. They even began planning their own _Dungeons and Dragons_ campaign. Their role playing ran right into the night, and all four Evans were out of energy by eleven.

Another misfortune was that not all four Evans could comfortably sleep on the bed, so two coin-flip-losing Evans had to sleep together in a sleeping bag on the floor. "Honestly" they thought "I don't even mind this," as they were even more snug with their partner.

As they all began to rest, one sleeping bag Evan inquired "any wishes for tonight guys? The last two came true." They all had the same wish, of course. "You know... it would be nice to have an even bigger audience for our wedding" a bed Evan replied. "Yeah. Not to mention how my days get exponentially better with the more of us there are." "Maybe we should word our wishes more vaguely though, as that's how we did the last two times."

They thunk for a second before they all came up with the same idea. Speaking at the same time, all four Evans said:

"I wish there was a large group of people that loved and cared for me equally, and as equals." This quote stuck with them as they all quickly fell asleep, excited for the rewards in store for them tomorrow.


End file.
